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Thursday 29 August 2013

Microwaves variable power?

Why do microwaves bother with anymore than one setting...
I've never picked up an item to microwave that asks me to put it on Low or Medium!

Sunday 18 August 2013

Hospitals are so sexist

Hospitals are so sexist man...
They let women get naked in the birthing pools and say nothing when the go potty in there..
But you try being a man and doing that, oh no.. They go chicken oriental!
They like:
"Sir what do you think your doing"
"You can't be in here Sir"
"OMG, did he just... Urgh.. Floater!!!!"
"Security!!!"

I'm like:
"why you carrying me away Mr Security man, those Nurses are the ones being out of order... Equal rights and all that!!"
"I know that wasn't my partners birthing pool but she wasn't ready yet & needed to poo"

Sunday 16 June 2013

Fathers Day

For all past puberty, today is a day to remember all the lost sperm who got flushed down a toilet or trapped forever in a condom, in a sock or squirted back out of a vagina...

To all those lost sperm who were with me in that epic race to the egg some 28 years ago...
HaHa, loosers!! L-oo-se-rs
I won, you lost... :-p

Please, lets all take a moment of silence for our past comrades..

Also, when do we get that No#1 Trophy?