Cooking programs

I hate cooking programs!!
I hate them because, although I enjoy watching them on a Saturday morning, when there is F all else to watch... I get hungry & want to cook the things that catch my eye..

Only thing is.. They are bloody liers!
It isn't a 'quick dish'.!!
A quick dish, is something I can make in a few minutes.. Like Omlette!!

How about a phonecall the day before.. Tell me what your making, so I can get the ingrediants!!
Coz, now, its mid morning on Saturday, i'm fucking starving, thamks to you & although I have food, I dont have the bloody food your making!
So, now I have to go down the shops & buy the stuff.. That takes an hour because, anybody knows, you can't just get what you need.. You might not know you need something until you see it.. So you have to zig-zag your way through the aisles.. Doubling back know & then, becasue the fuckers have swapped it all around again!!!

When I finally do get home & start cooking, I look in the oven.. But theres no pre-prepared chicken, like when the looj in their oven, having only just made it?!
I though this was part of the deal.. You make it, then before you cook it, you put it to one side, open the oven & theres the finished version!!!

So, now this 'quick!!! Dish!!!', is three hours in, my stomachs chewing on my intestines for sustinance & finally, my version of this allegedly 'quick dish' is done...

I sit down.. Tuck in &... Errrrr...
Its disgusting!! Even the Cat turns its nise up, like: Oh no, thats not even food anymore!!

So thats why I hate them!!
Why not, just show me how to make Ceriel.. Or Toast, covered in butter!!
Bastards!